MarriageMariageWhen Harka Jit Libang got married — when he married, his father had already died, he had only his mother.At that time in a place called Waruma [near Libang] — the daughter of a certain Dhansiri — one they called Waru Mahili — had been married in Linkhim in the Tamar valley.[When she came back to Waruma on a visit] she brought down her husband's younger sister as a companion .She had brought down a companion, and they had come down to Waruma [above Libang] and there Harka Jit Libang's mother saw them.She saw them and said "Well, the girl is very good-looking."Then, wondering if it would be a good match, they — Waru Maili together with Harka Jit Libang's mother — discussed it.They discussed it and — in Nepali they call it "kutuni" [matchmaker's fee] — "Well! If you'll give me the matchmaker's fee, I'll fix up the girl for you all," Waru Mahili told them.Then Harka Jit Libang's mother, who was a remote in-law of Waru Mahili's [being married to an elder member of WM's clan] said "All right."[After an interruption, the narrator begins again in the first person.] When I got married, Waru Mahili had brought a girl from Linkhim in the Tamar Khola down as a companion.When she had brought her down, I went to paddy-dance.I went and we two paddy-danced and sang.While we were paddy-dancing, she sang to me and I sang to her.Then the next day my mother asked me,"Well, we heard that a girl has come up there, and you two danced paddy together.If you like her, we'll bring her down and marry her to you," my mother said to me."I like her. The girl is nice," I told my mother.When I said that my mother gathered my paternal uncles, older and younger, and my brothers and cousins, all who stayed in the village,saying "Motta says all right," she got them together.Actually my name isn't just Motta, it's Harka Jit.She got them together and they asked me again, "OK, you like her, right?"They asked me and I told them, "Yes, I like her."When I told them that, we all got together and went and asked her — Waru Mahili asked Dhansiri's daughter.When we asked her [she said] "I have my father and my mother and my brothers.You don't get to just elope with me.Let's go up to my house. Come on up!"she told them, Asmati who lived in Linkhim in the Tamur Khola."It's best if you stay down here, we're telling you.We have to take money and beer and meat and a pig to your parents," they said, "in the village."My uncles and aunts went and told her.But the girl didn't agree.When she didn't agree, Waru Mahili asked for a little money.My mother gave her 50 rupees."OK, now I can fix it up for you," said her husband's junior clan-member [i.e. Waru Maili, to HJ's mother]."Staying and living with people who are so important is a good thing.There's land. You won't be in need," she said,She coaxed her.Even so, the girl didn't agree."I am someone who has parents!I'm going up to my parents' place. You all just come on up!You talk to my father and mother, and if they agree, I agree," she said.Then my uncles from the village said,"Get married down here and then go up and tell your parents.However much your parents say, we can give them the money in full," they said,but the girl didn't agree. There was one of her relatives [in the village] — an older sister — her cousin on her mother's side — Tarbare' wife — she ran away down there.She ran away and we all chased after her.When we chased after her she went into her cousin's house and didn't come out.So we sat at the downhill door. Some of us stayed at the door on the uphill side and some stayed over at the front door.Again we talked of the marriage.Then the girl came out and ran off.She ran a little way downhill.Five or six of us chased after her.We went down and caught her.First I caught her.Then behind me and in front of me — behind her and in front of her they all came down too and held her.They caught her and brought her back up here to her cousin's house.When they brought her up, she said, "Since you're holding me and dragging me off, bring it [the bride-price], if you're able!Bring the money! Bring the gold!" she said.Then we brought a gold earring.We brought 200 rupees.Even though she didn't agree, we made her agree and brought her up.We brought her up here and performed the marriage.Three or four days after we performed the marriage some trackers came down [from the girl's village].They traced her.When the tracker came down, he turned up without having met the marriage-offering deliverers [who were on their way up to the girl's village] on the way.The marriage-offering deliverers came out up in Linkhim, in the Tamur Khola.The tracker came down and we offered him hospitality.We received him, and after arriving in the evening he went back in the morning.He went back again.When the tracker arrived up there he told them,"They have married your daughter down there, the Libang subba's family,"the tracker told the girl's father up there in Linkhim, in the Tamur Khola.Her father shouted, he jumped, he danced.The one who had gone up from down here to deliver the offering heard it too.He didn't eat the marriage-offering [a leg of pork].He threw it out.When he threw it out, his brothers all got together and carved it up and ate it.So when the marriage-offering deliverer came back down"How was it?" asked Harka Jit's mother and all his uncles."The old man shouted — the girl's father shouted and jumped around,and he didn't eat the offering.Then his brothers got together and they ate the offering — they ate it," he told them.They held a council down here to decide what to do next."Well, now we'll persuade the girl and then go [up to the girl's village],from down here together with his uncles and his mother.My uncles took counsel with my mother and we went.When we went with the marriage-gifts [Nep. car kalam], "Well you Libang chiefs — did you take my daughter willingly or against her will?" he shouted and screeched.He looked for his daughter to ask her.But his daughter had gone to stay in her younger uncle's house.She didn't come.So he didn't get to ask her.We had arrived in the evening, and it had become night, and it was even dawn, but they didn't even give us rice.They didn't give us beer.So we just sat there.One of our Pangbopma clan women up there — our cousin-sister lived there.She gave us beer and rice.She gave us rice and beer and we ate and drank without my father-in-law seeing it.If he had seen it he would have abused her.Then when the sun came up the affair began to be settled a little."Well, what all have you brought up?" he asked the party who had gone from down here —"What all have you brought up?" he asked us."We've given a gold earring to your daughter.And 200 rupees.And we've brought up a tola of gold,and 400 rupees," my companions said.The old man said, "Well, how can you have the girl?— how can you get her for a tola of gold and 400 rupees?"the old man shouted again.He shouted, but his brothers came and said, "Now, why are you making such a big thing over an affair that's already settled.It's no good making a big deal over something that's finished," his brothers reasoned with my father-in-law.They reasoned with him and he agreed.Well! So we put down 400 rupees and a tola of gold,and he took it.Then he took away all the beer and the meat.Only then did they give us some beer.And a bit later they gave us rice.They gave us rice and it became day,without our getting to sleep.Without getting any sleep, the next day they kept us in, my father and mother-in-law, all day long.Then the next day, after we'd stayed one day and the affair was completely settled, we came back down here.That's all, sir.